When I first met Teddie, and realized that there was much I didn't know, and that in order to keep him happy and to get the most enjoyment out of having my very own subby, I would need to do some research. This is because my learning style is to read it in a book, and then practice what I learn.
My husband had just given me a Kindle for Christmas. Kindles are awesome. They allow you to download the kind of books people would question you about if you were caught reading them in public, and the kind of books your teenagers would ask about if they saw them in your bookshelf. So, with a password protected Kindle, I was all set.
So I found on the Amazon website, my first book about female dominance. The Mistress Manual: The Good Girl's Guide to Female Dominance by Mistress Lorelei gave me an excellent start. I love that book, and I love Mistress Lorelei. I was able to easily adapt her instructions about how to train a submissive to my online situation. And most importantly, I was able to understand that I am not a freak. My dominant personality and the dominant personalities of the women that raised me are actually normal, and perhaps the way things should be. It is my bible. I read it again and again for refreshing my skills (for use with My Treasure and My Husband, both) and sometimes I just read it for entertainment.
This is a website, not a book, but I have read every word of Real Women Don't Do Housework, by Lady Misato. I love when you get step-by-step instructions. Her instructions on how to train your husband (and why it works) are right on target and easy to follow.
I am kind of hesitant about "coming out" to my husband, and have controlled things in my marriage is a stealth way (hence the title of this blog) which I know is basically dishonest. (But then again, does my husband have the right to know everything I am thinking? Are not my thoughts my own?) So anyway, reading Lady Misato's website gave me the idea about getting my husband, who works incredibly hard, but still does not do much around the house, to participate more. If I asked him directly, he will do what I ask, but not with a cheerful, compliant, attitude, which is what I like. After all, he lives here too. Also, I don't think I should have to ask repeatedly for him to do the floors or put his socks in the hamper instead of on the floor beside the hamper.
In my next post, I will tell you how Lady Misato's method is working for us. In the meantime, I recommend these books for the beginning female domestic dominant. They might be the only thing you need to get started on a more satisfying relationship with your man.